To Be Going down the Hamas Tunnel Network, Or Not To Be –That is the Question

 

As predicted by pollsters and prophesied by editors of corporate press in the USA and Europe, Joe Biden, Sunak, Macron, Olaf and Netanyahu are joint winners of the Nobel Peace Prize. This brief meeting took place on the side-lines of the Award giving ceremony in a hotel conference room at Oslo, Norway  

Netanyahu: It was easy for IDF to commit genocide of Palestinians. As my allies you all were cheering me up. But would anyone actually join us to go down the Hamas tunnel network said to be about 500 k.m. long and situated at several levels up to 240 feet deep, in fact right-up to the water table.

Joe Biden: You remember what happened to American soldiers in the rat-tunnels of Vietcong. I will not send our soldiers down the tunnel now. My rating is down and elections are eight months away. Sorry, Netanyahu.

Sunak: I am already facing Pro-Palestine protest rallies in which 300,000 people have taken part. I am under stress. Our economy is in shambles.

Olaf Schulz: Remember the Battle of Messines in 1917 where 455 tons of explosives placed in 21 tunnels created a huge explosion that killed an estimated 10,000 Germans. This battle was fought between German and British forces. The mines were detonated under German trenches!

My friend Sunak the Germans can never really trust you or even forgive you. Of-course we are together in this genocide for political purposes. But yes, I won’t send German soldiers in Hamas tunnels. Who knows you may repeat the trick you used on our soldiers in 1917.

Macron: I can never forget the French occupation of Vietnam. And the First Indochina War (1946). Initially confident of victory, we had ignored the real political cause of the war – the desire of people of Vietnam to achieve independence for their country. It is sad but true that we had to pull out of the region in 1954 rather disgracefully. Thanks to the USA which bailed us out.

Joe Biden: I regret that we jumped in the War in Vietnam. Like cowards we had to pull-out of Vietnam in 1973. Thousands of our soldiers died in the Cu Chi tunnels. In the tunnels booby traps with hand grenades, anti-personnel mines, snakes, rats, spiders, scorpions and ants awaited us. Poison gases were used against our soldiers.

Sorry, we can not go down the Hamas tunnels. Let me remind you our B-52 bombers failed to destroy the tunnels which were 240 feet deep in Vietnam. During this 20-year war we lost 58220 US Service Members.

Sunak: Even today we are encountering sites in France where 28 British tunnellers lie entombed after dying during WW1. Imagine getting to see dead bodies of soldiers after 100 years. So, we will not go down the Hamas tunnel network.

(The arguments became heated. At one point Olaf held Sunak by the neck and asked him about the killings of 10,000 Germans during WW1 by the British treachery. At this point Biden blamed Macron for running away from Vietnam and trapping the USA into bailing out France from the Vietnam War.)

Finally, the meeting ended with the following press statement being released:

“We – USA, UK, France, Germany and Israel – will finish Hamas and their under-ground tunnels. But we will choose the time of entering the tunnels at our convenience. All of us have 100 years of experience in dealing with such tunnel warfare.”

[P.S. Sahni is member of PIL Watch Group.]